Following spiritual abuse at Lexington church, survivors found ‘beauty out of the ashes.’

[Pelican Press 0]

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Following spiritual ****** at Lexington *******, survivors found ‘beauty out of the ashes.’

On July 3, Lexington was rocked by news

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had been arrested for allegedly having **** with a minor for nearly a year before.

Zachary King, 47, is facing charges of first-degree *****, third-degree *****, first-degree *******, third-degree *******, first-degree ******* ****** and procuring or promoting the use of a minor by electronic means, according to court records. Shortly after that LexCity announced

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One of the strongest voices to come out of the ensuing melee was a non-profit called The Way Home.

“This is a devastating and grievous ****** of power, position, and authority—and in this case, a ********* act, as well,” The Way Home said in a statement on

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. “Clergy ******* ******, especially of a minor, is deeply wounding for victims, churches, and the community at large.”

They listed support times for Zoom support groups and dates, as well as free online resources and prayers.

“We know that the path ahead is a difficult one. Processing and healing will take time,” The Way Home said in the statement.

What only a few people already knew is that the ties between the Way Home and LexCity were tight, borne out of trauma suffered a decade ago at the very same *******.

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founders Sharon Clements and Connie Sanders —and a board of directors — had formed the group of the wreckage of the former Quest Community *******, which “rebranded” to LexCity ******* after another pastor scandal there in 2014.

Back then, neither woman had the vocabulary or understanding of spiritual ****** to truly understand what had happened.

“****** is so horrible, but our story is about hope, about beauty coming out of ashes.” Clements told me. “I wish I weren’t as educated as I am but I’m so glad to have the eyes to see and help others walk through this.”

The Herald-Leader does not usually use the names of ****** survivors, but Clements gave permission for this column on The Way Home.

Unhealthy relationships

Clements and Sanders were both deeply involved with the founding and rapid growth of Quest ******* and the Questapalooza ********** music festival.

In 2014, the ******* had grown to about 5,000 members. Clements was a worship pastor and Sanders was on the ministry team. In 2014, lead pastor Pete Hise announced he and Clements were stepping back from their ministries because of

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data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///ywAAAAAAQABAAACAUwAOw==

Quest Community ******* in Lexington, ***., Wednesday evening, August 27, 2008. Photo by Matt Goins

At the time, Clements did not contest the statement that the relationship was consensual. But in the aftermath — the pain of their families and hundreds of parishioners — she eventually realized it definitely was not.

“I didn’t have any framework,” Clements said. “None of the definitions made any sense to me. My loyalty had been so played to protect my pastor — to say anything else would be turning on him. There was so much dissonance.”

Time, prayer and counseling brought new wisdom about the truth of the matter: It was ******.

“It made me sad, but all the pieces went click, click, click,” Clements said.

The sisters realized that Clements was a survivor, but that Sanders was, as well — a system of ****** that manipulated volunteers and staff into unhealthy levels of service to the *******. These systems, which are so prevalent in organizations like churches, are often surrounding a charismatic leader who seems to have all the answers about ******* and everything else.

“We all bear a responsibility for that, we’re all part of a celebrity culture that yearns to elevate people,” Sanders said. “I propped up a pastor, but the ******* problem is that I propped up anyone at all.”

Pete Hise is now a pastor at a ******* in Henderson, across the Ohio River from Evansville. He did not respond to a call for comment on this story.

Spiritual ****** can often lead people to lose their ******. After all, if bad things can happen in the Lord’s House, then what’s the point? Clements and Sanders, though, wanted to keep their ****** and help others through what they had been through.

So a couple of years ago, they started thinking about The Way Home, what it could look like and who it could help.

“We had the understanding that **** wouldn’t waste what we were walking through,” Sander said.

The Way Home is based on three tenets: Awareness, care and training for survivors of ****** from any congregation. They are **********-based but are happy to work with survivors of other religions as well.

First, there are so many people who may not understand spiritual ****** systems, or the wide spectrum upon which they operate. Emotional and psychological ****** can take place completely separate from ******* ******, although all three are frequently tied together.

Hearing about a case at another ******* can trigger survivors to finally get help. Decades after the ********* ******* **** ****** scandals, more *********** ******* are being exposed, particularly within the Southern ******** *******.

The Way Home is open to all. Every Wednesday, there is a Zoom support group at 7 p.m. There’s also one on one peer support and lots of other resources.

The group is also dedicated to helping churches prevent these kinds of problems with training that makes leaders and parishioners more aware of how abusive systems set into organizations.

Back to ******

The work of The Way Home can apply to denominations and congregations anywhere and everywhere. But it was also birthed out of the dysfunction of Quest Community ******* and LexCity *******, which were both heralded as an exciting, innovative space that allowed young people a place to worship.

Jacque Adkins now serves on The Way Home board of directors. She and her husband were part of the launch team for Quest, “but over time, the pastor built a system that ended up being spiritually abusive.”

Basically, Adkins said, she was volunteering more than 60 hours a week with three small children, and it was never enough.

“The expectation was you were all in all the time,” she said.

Since then, she’s recognized the same signs of toxicity in other troubled churches:

“You have the market on doing it right. You give your all. There’s a lack of boundaries,” she said. “There can be a caste system, where you the pastor is surrounded by an inner circle, and the control happens in those inner circles. The numbers matter more than anything.”

The Adkins left the ******* in 2008. She was not surprised to see the latest news about LexCity, saying the organization had rebranded without actually healing from its toxic past.

Jacque Adkins reconciled with Clements and Sanders, agreeing to serve on the board of The Way Home.

“When people are involved in spiritually abusive systems, they can want to turn away from ******, many will turn away from ****,” Adkins said. “The hope for The Way Home is that we can help people heal, they are not alone, there is hope, that **** grieves about what happened and they can find their way back to ******.”

The organization’s title is taken from Jeremiah 31:21 : “Set up your signposts and road markers to find your way home.”

“Light is good, but it can be so painful,” Clements said. “It’s the light that’s healing.”

To reach The Way Home, go to

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#spiritual #****** #Lexington #******* #survivors #beauty #ashes

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