It Turns Out That Most People Wipe Their Butts Completely Wrong, But This Doctor Is Here To Teach Us The Right Way

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It Turns Out That Most People Wipe Their Butts Completely Wrong, But This Doctor Is Here To Teach Us The Right Way

You’ve probably heard that few things in life are certain except ****** and taxes, but we’d like to add something else to the list: cleaning up in the bathroom.

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So, since we have to do it, what’s the best technique?

The preferred method of wiping “is not wiping,” nationally renowned ***** surgeon Dr. Evan Goldstein told us — Raj Punjabi and Noah Michelson, co-hosts of 

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 podcast — when we recently chatted with him.

“When you’re looking at someone’s [*****], to the left and the right are these wrinkles ― it’s like an accordion. It opens. It closes,” said Goldstein, who is also the CEO and founder of 

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“The front and the back ― towards the *******, towards the ****** and ********* area, or the tailbone, the skin there is not wrinkled. It’s very thin. When we wipe, where do we wipe? Usually front to back — thin skin! We all wipe so much, so what happens over time? People tear the skin. It gets irritated. It gets ****** at us.”

Instead of wiping, Goldstein suggested cleaning the area without ******* paper. “I’m a huge bidet [fan],” he told us, because it can thoroughly wash the ***** without harming it. He also recommended a quick shower or rinse if you don’t own a bidet. “You always want to make sure you’re drying yourself,” he added, because moisture in that area can cause irritation.

This is also one of the reasons why he is firmly anti-wet wipes.

Valeriy Lushchikov / Getty Images

“They are so terrible — not only for the environment, but for your *****,” he said. “There’s so many companies out there throwing wipes and I think they should all be banned. I see 90 people a week [in my surgical office], and I would say one-third of all the people coming through are coming in from wet wipe-induced issues.”

That’s because using them can change the microbiome of that area of the body.

“Think about it — we have good bacteria, we have bad bacteria, but they are in homeostasis. They are in equilibrium. Wet wipes ***** that in a really bad way,” Goldstein said. “I see ridiculous dermatitis [in my patients] … bacterial infections. … Now that you’ve messed up that microbiome, it’s causing so many problems.”

If you are going to wipe using ******* paper, he recommended more of a “blot” than a wipe and doing it in a “standing squat,” because there’s less blood flowing to that part of the body when you’re standing. And that means less potentially problem-causing pressure on the delicate area.

Universal Pictures

“The longer you’re sitting on the bowl, the more blood [down there], the more wiping, the more irritation. The body senses that,” Goldstein said. Instead, we want to get vertical again as soon as possible to relieve that pressure. “So, you *****, wipe once or twice [while seated], finish standing up. Why? The blood starts to leave [when you stand up]. The mechanism starts to go back to the normal, daily [position],” Goldstein said.

“There are some people that it’s ******* [to wipe] when they’re standing,” he noted. “They don’t feel like they’re getting the full *****. … But we don’t need to go all up in there. If you are going all up in there, we need to go back to diet and fiber and pre- and probiotics, and thinking about better strategies. I always say, ‘It’s not ***** health; it’s gut health.’ If you have gut health, you will automatically have ***** health.”

Goldstein also chatted with us about why squatting is the best position for ********, what a perfect ***** should look like and much more. Check out the full episode

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, subscribe to Am I Doing It Wrong? so you don’t miss a single episode.

For more from Goldstein, visit 

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 or his 

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 page, and check out 

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.This article originally appeared on

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